


Just Like Starting Over

by hermioneclone



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: F/M, Sexy Times, Teen!Derek, innocence kink (kinda), see the a/n, the underage thing is complicated
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-29
Updated: 2014-09-29
Packaged: 2018-02-19 07:35:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2380163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hermioneclone/pseuds/hermioneclone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After emerging from his prison a teenage boy, Derek Hale doesn’t know what to make of his new companions (or captors, he can’t be sure). Haunted by his ex, he tries to find some semblance of closure with the help of one Lydia Martin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One

**Author's Note:**

> Cannon through 4x01.
> 
> For anyone concerned with the underage competent, here's the deal. Teen!Derek is about 17 (probably almost 18), Lydia is 18. Everything is consensual. Nothing sexual happens until part 2. If you have any concerns feel free to ask.
> 
> This was one of my favorite fics to write. I hope you enjoy!

Part 1:

Derek Hale gasped as his lungs hungrily devoured the fresh air, leaning on the arms of two strangers. They walked, or more accurately held him up as he limped between them, towards blinding lights, a car with several shadowy figures coming in their direction. Blind panic rose up in Derek’s chest but he was too weak to resist an attack. He was at his captor’s mercy. 

“Is that him? Is that Derek?” a woman’s voice asked skeptically, her face suddenly coming into focus as it was illuminated by the headlights.

“Sort of,” a man’s voice replied. Derek forced his head upward to look. His eyes locked with the man who had spoken, though he couldn’t have been any older than Derek himself. But he seemed so mature, so adult; it was hard to call him a boy. Derek tried desperately to read the emotions on his face and use his wolf senses to get read on the man but it was a confusing mix of shock and sadness and worry and concern that made no sense for someone he had never met in his life. It couldn’t have been someone he’d gone to school with, they were about the same age, he’d _know_ him. 

“Let’s get back to Beacon Hills. We’ll figure this out there,” the man propped under his left shoulder announced.

Derek perked up at the mention of the familiar name. “You’re taking me home?” he asked hopefully.

The man in front of him exchanged a look with the man holding him, he couldn’t read it but it was definitely a look and not a good one. “Yeah, you’re going back to Beacon Hills.”

That wasn’t an answer. “But I can see my family, right?”

“I’m afraid that won’t be possible,” the man informed him grimly. 

Anger flared up in Derek’s chest, expelling all reason. “Why not?” He forced himself to stand a little straighter even though it took all of the little energy he had to do so. “I swear, if you hurt me, my mother is going to rip you to shreds, she’s a powerful woman you know.” 

“Oh my god,” another woman’s voice whispered. Derek’s eyes flicked to hers, his breath catching at the sight of pale skin framed by an auburn crown. He couldn’t help but avert his gaze, slightly overwhelmed and self-conscious of his disheveled state. “He doesn’t know.”

“I don’t know what?” Derek exclaimed. 

“Yeah, what is it?” the first woman asked.

“Not now,” the man holding him up announced authoritatively. “He’s been through enough for one day.”

“Please, just tell me,” Derek begged, hating how weak he sounded to his own ears and terrified at whatever it was he was supposed to know.

The redhead stepped forward. “Scott, we have to tell him eventually. It’ll just be worse if we drag this out.”

Nodding, the man named Scott lowered Derek down to the ground, gently supporting his weight as their positions shifted. Derek looked up at him, their eyes meeting for the first time since Scott had taken his hand and pulled him from his personal hell. There was a kindness to them that Derek couldn’t explain, something that reassured him even as he felt waves of anxiety and sadness radiating off of the man, signaling the worst. “Derek...the reason you can’t go back to your family is... they’re dead, Derek. Most of them anyways. There was a fire, years ago now. They’re gone.”

Derek’s heart sank. He hadn’t been rescued after all. This was just another cruel trick of his torture chamber. He shook his head vigorously. “No, no they’re not. This isn’t real, you’re not real, none of you are real,” he chanted, as if saying it would make it so.

Scott sighed. “Derek, I am so sorry. But we are.”

“No,” Derek insisted, but the ground felt all too firm underneath him and he had never been able to read the hallucinations before, not like this. “No, no, no, no,” he moaned, tears threatening to escape from his eyes as the reality finally sunk in.

Suddenly, he felt himself being pulled into a tight hug by Scott. “I am so sorry,” he repeated, his entire being laced with sincerity. Derek nodded awkwardly into his shoulder, knowing that he should feel self-conscious about their embrace but not really caring at the moment. “Wait,” he gasped, breaking back. “You said most. Who’s still alive?”

“Cora, but she’s left Beacon Hills. And Peter.”

Derek rolled his eyes. “Figures.” He paused for a moment, collecting his thoughts. “And Laura?”

“She was with you, she survived the fire.” Hope flared up in his chest. Of course he loved his baby sister, but she was just that, a baby, at least to him. Laura had always been by his side, always taking care of him. “But she was killed later.” A sharp knife of emotion stabbed Derek in the chest, chiding himself for getting his hopes up.

“How?”

“Peter.”

Derek shut his eyes tightly against the anger that welled up inside him. “Fucking bastard.”

Scott chuckled, though his face was dark. “Tell me about it.”

“Look, I hate to break up this wonderful party,” the woman who had carried him out with Scott interrupted, “But I didn’t escape animated skeletons to die standing by the side of a road. We have to get out of here.”

Scott sighed. “Braeden’s right,” he sighed before turning back to Derek. “I know that this is a lot to take in and I’m so sorry about it but we have to get going. I just...I know we’re strangers to you, but I promise...we’re your family, have been for a while now. We’ll take care of you, okay?” 

All Derek could do was nod before Scott hoisted him up once more, though this time the redhead braced his other side. Their eyes met again and he ducked his head, blushing furiously, confused by how comforted he felt in spite of what he had just been told.

*#*#*#*#*#*#*

Derek swallowed thickly as he tried to keep his breathing even, trying not to panic. The only thing he was sure of that he was thankful to be out of his hellish prison where the world seemed to be upside down. He just wasn’t sure if he was walking right into another. At the moment, it sure felt like one, jammed into the backseat of an old Jeep between the awkward poking of the car door and the most gorgeous woman he’d ever seem. He shut his eyes for a moment; images of Kate flooded his internal eye, making him almost want to vomit. He wasn’t entirely sure why. She hadn’t ever done anything to him. Except she had something to do with his capture, somehow the truth of that, the truth that she _had _harmed him even if he didn’t know how was something that Derek knew for a fact.__

__What he didn’t know was who these people who rescued him were and what they wanted with him. How could he know he could trust what Scott had said, that they were his family. They could just be trying to control him for all he knew. They were all strangers to him, their names of introduction ringing hollow in his ears. Scott felt somehow familiar; if nothing else, Derek could tell he was a wolf, probably an Alpha. There was something odd about the scent of the other two girls that he couldn’t place...they weren’t wolf but certainly weren’t human. But the one next to him...Lydia...she didn’t smell quite human either, but she was certainly no animal._ _

__He was startled by a hand slipping into his own. Eyes flying open, he glanced over at Lydia who was looking at him with deep concern. “I can’t say everything’s going to be okay,” she told him softly, as if by lowering her voice her words were meant only for him. “But you’re not alone in this, okay?”_ _

__“Why?” Derek asked, confused._ _

__Lydia’s face hardened, and Derek almost recoiled with the grief that suddenly spilled off of her. “I’ve already lost one friend recently. I’m not about to lose another,” she replied, her voice hard and determined._ _

__Derek nodded even though he didn’t really understand, wondering how much longer they would be driving._ _


	2. Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's a bit longer! And more focused on Lydia and Derek. :)

It had been a few weeks since his rescue, and Derek’s head was much clearer. Mostly. 

On the trip back to Beacon Hills he had been told about his adult life he no longer remembered. Scott and Lydia took him back to what they told him was his loft. He still wasn’t sure what he did for a living, but he must have been pretty well off to have a home like _that_. He almost didn’t believe that he lived there until he found a picture of him and his sister, older than he remembered but he looked younger than in the rest of the photographs. They looked sad, eyes hollow from lack of sleep, but still loving. On the back was his sister’s scribbled handwriting. “Love you always, dork,” the inscription read, the words causing a wave of grief to wash over him.

It had been a bit unnerving seeing the furniture strewn around, clearly from some sort of struggle that he was thankful to have forgotten. Scott offered to let him stay at his place if he would feel more comfortable and Derek was grateful; he didn’t want to be alone.

Scott mostly had filled him in on the nitty-gritty details, with Stiles dropping by sometimes to share a pizza and lighten the mood. Stiles didn’t seem to know how to act around Derek in his teenage form, or at least that’s how it felt to Derek. Scott assured him that he was that awkward and goofy most of the time. 

As hard as it was, he had begun to make peace with his loss. There wasn’t anything he could do to change it and wallowing seemed pointless. He finally decided to move back to the loft after a few weeks, feeling at least somewhat secure enough to try and manage on his own, knowing that he had people watching out for him. Scott had been right, they were his family. Scott’s mother had been so nice to him and he felt bad for leaving, but it was time. Besides, it wasn’t like he would be on his own entirely. Though there had been no news on the Kate Argent front, they were still concerned that she would target Derek again. He knew that Scott probably only agreed to let him leave by organizing a watch on his apartment. He felt bad for inconveniencing those whom he was just starting to consider friends, but was thankful that Scott understood that he needed some space to process what had happened.

But his first night alone…he was almost regretting it. He couldn’t help but feel haunted by Kate and his newfound knowledge of how she had destroyed his life more than once now. He hated how she got into his head like this, he hated that she had this kind of power over him, hated that he was the one who brought her into his home and that it was his fault that everything he loved had been decimated.

Somehow he made it through the night, though his sleep was fitful and riddled with nightmares. After waking late and finally giving up on trying to get any more rest, Derek went for a run, which helped a little bit, but he was still feeling wound up after he stepped out of the shower and pulled on the first clean clothes he could find. They didn’t quite fit him right; even though the shirts seemed skin tight in the photos; his adult self was a bit more well built than his teenage form. But it didn’t matter that much. It seemed silly to buy too many new clothes when he had no idea how long he would remain in his altered state. 

He scrounged around in his newly stocked refrigerator (Scott’s mother had sent him home with about half of the contents of the McCall kitchen, insisting he would have eaten it anyway if he was still living with them. Lunch sat heavy in his stomach as he tried to distract himself with television, a book, anything. He had just read the same page for the fifth time when a knock on the door startled him, the book jumping out of his lap at the shock. He froze in terror. What if Kate had returned and gotten past the watch? He hadn’t been able to fight her off as a fully grown adult and he had muscles then! Or what if he was being entirely too optimistic of Scott or any of them caring what his fate was?

“Derek?” a now familiar voice called through the door. “Are you there?”

Suddenly freed from his momentary paralyzation, Derek scrambled to answer the door before she went away. “Lydia,” he greeted as he slid the door open, heart pounding wildly in his chest. 

“Hi,” she replied softly with a tender smile. “I just wanted to check and see how you were holding up on your own.”

Derek mustered the best smile he was capable of, hoping it was convincing. “I’m alright,” he assured her.

Lydia snorted. “I think those gigantic bags under your eyes tell otherwise. Rough night?”

Sighing heavily, Derek nodded, leading Lydia into the loft. “I can’t stop thinking about Kate,” he confessed.

“Ah,” Lydia replied, her lips tight. “She certainly is unforgettable.”

Derek tugged at his hair frantically as he paced back and forth. “How could I let her do this to me? How could I have given her so much power over me? It’s all my fault.”

“Derek, stop,” Lydia insisted, grabbing his shoulder, forcing him to stop moving. “It’s not your fault. Look, sometimes bad people make good people do bad things. But it doesn’t make the good person bad. You aren’t a bad person.”

Sighing, Derek dropped himself onto the sofa unceremoniously. “But what if I am? I barely even know who I am anymore.”

Lydia sat down carefully next to him, swiftly taking his hand tightly in both of her own. “I’ve known you for a while now, and in that time, yeah, you’ve made mistakes, you’ve even been selfish at times. But you never deliberately set out to hurt anyone. You are a good, loyal friend who will do anything to protect the people he cares about.”

Derek shook his head. “But I’m not him. How do you know…?”

Lydia cupped the side of his face, turning it to face her earnest expression. “But you are him. And yeah, you are missing a few crucial life experiences. But I find it hard to believe that you started suffering and suddenly became an entirely new and improved person. If you hadn’t been good to begin with, all of that loss would have torn you apart.”

“I suppose,” Derek sighed, not really convinced but he knew that if he continued to protest Lydia would not be swayed. “Can I ask you a question? About Kate?”

Confusion laced Lydia’s face but she nodded. “Of course, but I don’t know that much about her time with you.”

Figures. Derek has come to realize that adult him was fairly secretive. Though if adult him had to deal with this kind of pain, maybe he wouldn’t want to talk about it. “Do you know if I slept with her? Scott didn’t know and I don’t know why I’m even asking you. But besides Scott you’re the one person who feels familiar and I don’t know, maybe I confided in you or something?”

Lydia shook her head sadly. “I’m sorry. I mean, we’re friends and I trust you, but you don’t tend to hang out with us teenagers much unless it’s some crisis or another.”

“Ah,” Derek replied. “I seem to have done that a lot. Push people away.”

“You do,” Lydia replied matter-of-factly. “I think you don’t want to get hurt again. Or don’t want to be the reason someone else is in pain.”

“Can I ask you something?”

“What?”

“Does it work?”

Lydia shook her head, her her face scrunched up as she made a little clicking noise. “Not really.”

Derek huffed out a singular laugh, the sound hard and dry in his throat. “Adult me is an idiot.”

Lydia smirked like she was trying to hold back a larger display of mirth, looking down at her lap to try (and fail) at hiding her emotion. “I don’t know if I would go that far,” she finally choked out.

Derek could help but feel the corners of his mouth twitch up towards his cheeks; her laughter was infectious. “It’s okay. I am kind of ridiculous.” Lydia looked up at him, but her face quickly shifted into confusion. “What?”

“You’re smiling,” she replied simply.

“So?” Derek replied with a shrug.

“So, you hardly ever do that. It’s nice.”

“It is,” Derek agreed.

“And, I hate to ruin this moment,” Lydia continued, leaning closer so that their shoulders were touching. “But you were asking about Her. And I’m curious why. And I guess I’m hoping that if I can get you talking while you’re Mr. Chattypants here then maybe you’ll be better off in the long run and we’ll see that smile a lot more.”

Derek leaned into her shoulder, the connection feeling like a lifeline. It was so intimate, two arms pressed together in a show of solidarity. Somehow it made him feel safe, feel grounded. Like Kate didn’t have to keep haunting him anymore. “I was just trying to figure out if she was my first time.”

“Ah. So you’ve never…”

“I’m seventeen,” Derek huffed in reply, as if that was a sufficient answer. “I’m sorry, that was kinda a dumb thing to say.”

“It’s okay,” she replied. “Does it really matter if she was though?”

Derek shrugged. “I guess not. But I just...I guess I just wondered if she took everything from me.”

Lydia was quiet for a few minutes. Finally, she spoke. “What if we could change that?”

Derek frowned. “How? We can’t travel back in time. Well, I know I did, sort of, but that’s not what I meant.”

“But that’s exactly what I mean,” Lydia explained. “I mean, I know this whole ordeal has to have been difficult, but it kind of could be like a fresh start. Just because she was your first time then doesn’t mean you can’t make a different choice now.”

Derek snorted. “Yeah, like I know anyone who would be willing to sleep with me.” Lydia just started at him, eyebrows raise, waiting for him to get it. “Oh, I couldn’t,” he replied when it all clicked.

“I’ve seen you looking,” she teased, eyes glinting playfully.

“I can’t ask you to do that,” he insisted. The idea was absurd. Or at least that was what he kept repeating to himself.

“You didn’t ask, I offered.”

Derek shook his head. “I don’t want you to have to suffer just trying to make me feel better; it’s not fair to you.”

Lydia chuckled. “You might not be as filled out as you get in a few years, but trust me,” she leaned in and pressed her lips softly against his own. Derek inhaled sharply in shock, his brain short-circuiting momentarily as his sense were just flooded with Lydia and every particle in his body was screaming just to pull her close and stop questioning this. She pulled away just as quickly as she had approached, smirking slightly in satisfaction. “This is no hardship.”

“But I wouldn’t want to ruin this for you. Sex, I mean.”

Lydia snorted, clearly amused. “Oh honey, this isn’t my first time at the rodeo. And as cute as you are, I don’t think you can ruin all other men for me.”

“Oh,” Derek replied, his stomach sinking oddly, feeling like a fool for not even considering that possibility. Of course, Lydia had probably been with lots of guys. He wasn’t judging her for it. It was more that she would have a lot to compare him to and that was kind of unnerving. But he had to power through his uncertainly. So what if he wasn’t the best Lydia ever had? This would still be a hell of a lot more special than anything he shared with Kate. Maybe it would help him start to heal. “I guess that just means I’ll have a good teacher.”

Lydia grinned. “Okay, so we’re doing this? You’re not just doing it because it’s what you think I want you to do, right?”

Derek nodded. “I want this. I want you.” The words felt clumsy on his tongue but he did mean them, more than he probably should. “I just…”

“What is it?” Lydia asked, rubbing her thumb gently across his knuckles in a soothing pattern.

“What if I can’t control myself? What if my instincts take over and I hurt you?” He could already feel the beast rising with interest within him and it terrified him.

“You won’t,” Lydia assured him. “I’m sure that your instinct to protect is stronger. Just...focus on what makes you human. You’re the one in charge here.”

Derek leaned forward and kissed her softly, pressing their faces together as he cupped her cheek. “You’re amazing, you know?”

He felt a smile spread across Lydia’s face. “I know.”

*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*

After making out on the couch for the most amazing fifteen minutes of Derek’s life, Lydia stood up and led him towards his room after making a quick stop to her purse for her apparent emergency supply of condoms. She sat down on the edge of the bed, scooting her way backwards and somehow managing to look graceful. The teal skirt of her dress spilled across the mattress, fanned out over her legs enticingly. She gestured for Derek to join her, so he awkwardly scrambled to her side. Lydia pulled him into a deep kiss that felt so good Derek wasn’t sure if he could remember what it felt like to be sad. She broke away, panting for breath, and looked directly into his eyes, her emerald orbs swirling with emotion and lust. “Take off my underwear,” she whispered huskily. “But don’t look. Yet.”

Derek’s mouth felt as dry as a desert as he moved his shaking hands to comply. He kept his eyes on her face to avoid temptation as his fingers traced the smooth fabric down to where the dress rested right above her knee. He pressed gently against her thigh as his hands moved north under the skirt, his stomach flipping excitedly when Lydia’s breath hitched. He stopped when he reached another patch of cloth, his cock jerking suddenly in his pants at the lacy pattern his fingertips traced. “Go ahead,” she urged, lifting her hips slightly off the bed. Derek grabbed the tiny underwear and tugged them down, his hands drifting slightly to cup her ass as he made his way. From the satisfied grin she was wearing, he had done the right thing. Once the offending fabric was removed, Derek chanced a look the lacy red garment in his grip. The inside was oddly tacky, which confused him until he realized where exactly it came from, which caused him to start blushing furiously. “Hey, hey,” Lydia soothed, sensing his shift and stroking the sides of his face. “It’s okay, you’re doing great.” She pulled him into another kiss which led to another and another until she pushed him back and spread her legs wide as she could while keeping them flat on the bed. She grabbed the wrist of his right hand and brought it lower, guiding it under the skirt. Derek paused before he got too far.

“Are you sure?” he asked again, suddenly doubtful.

“Keep going,” Lydia insisted. Derek complied, soon rubbing against a wet patch. “Do you feel a little nub?” she asked. Derek moved his fingers around until he found something near the front that felt about right. He rubbed over it experimentally, freezing when Lydia let out a sharp hiss. 

“Oh my god, I hurt you, didn’t I?” he panicked before he saw Lydia shook her head.

“No, no. Just felt really good. Do it again.” Derek adjusted his fingers so that two were under the nub and that his thumb could track back and forth across the head. It felt awkward and like he couldn’t possibly be doing it right, but Lydia kept moaning softly, her hips bucking up towards the sensation. “You can go in. Just below the nub. Gently, with your fingers,” she instructed,

He found the opening she was talking about and frowned. “Are you sure they’ll fit?” It seemed rather small…

Lydia just rolled her eyes. “Derek, babies can come out of there. It’ll be fine. Trust me.”

Trying to push that thought out of his head, Derek slowly pushed his middle finger in with his index finger soon joining the tight heat. The thrusts of Lydia’s hips guided his movements, sliding and out while trying his best to pay attention to the nub. Her breathing began to get more erratic and he started moving faster, faster. Suddenly she cried out, tensing up around his digits. Derek was slightly worried, but even though her eyes were closed, her face looked relaxed and happy. It suddenly hit him that she had just come. _He had made someone else come_. It was an exciting feat for his teenage self; he wondered if adult Derek would get so much excitement from it. 

Lydia slowly blinked open her eyes, smiling up at him. “You’re a natural. You sure you’ve never done this before?”

“Well…”

She shook her head. “Never mind. Stupid question. Anyways, let’s keep going, shall we?”

Derek nodded eagerly, wondering what was next. He knew that she was teasing him but he didn’t care because he still had all of his clothes on and he still felt amazing. “What now?”

“Lose the shirt?” she asked, tugging at the hem.

“Yeah,” Derek agreed, grabbing the shirt and clumsily tearing it off over his head. Lydia looked up and down his bare chest, making Derek a little shy under the scrutiny. But there was something about the hungry look in her eyes that reassured him. For some bizarre reason, she _wanted him_ ; she wanted to see him like this, like more than this. He had to trust her, and he knew that he could. Lydia slowly brought a hand up and placed it softly on his chest, cupping his only partially formed peck, thumb ghosting over his nipple. His eyes fluttered shut instinctively at the pleasant sensation, leaning into her touch. 

“You’re so responsive,” Lydia murmured in a tone of admiration. 

Derek grinned, feeling his face heat up a little bit but not caring in the slightest. “Thanks.” He ran a hand across the shoulder of Lydia’s dress. “Can I…?”

“Of course,” she replied, pushing herself up into a seated position so he could have better access. Derek snaked his hands around her back tugging the zipper down gently, running his hands down her skin and relishing the slight shiver it induced. Once he finished, he pulled the garment over her head, letting her adjust so that the skirt was no longer pinned underneath. A flurry of teal obscured his vision until Lydia emerged, utterly and completely naked except for a bra that matched her previously discarded underwear. Derek quickly snapped his eyes back to her face, not sure how much he had been given permission to do, and last he knew she had said _not to look_. “Hey,” she interrupted him, as if reading his thoughts. “While I appreciate how polite you are trying to be, you don’t have to. I want you to see me, okay?” Derek nodded. Slowly, his eyes scanned down her body, lingering over the way the bra clung to her skin, just barely hiding those last few inches of skin. He took in her smooth creamy stomach before resting on the area his fingers had just vacated, a neatly trimmed patch of auburn hair resting on top of a little mound. It was mesmerizing, even more so when she shifted and spread her legs, revealing various hues of pink flesh. He swallowed thickly, feeling overwhelmed in the most positive way. Taking heed of Lydia’s words, he leaned over until he was on his hands and knees, crawling between her legs to get a closer look.

He looked up, Lydia’s face framed by the lacy mountains of her bosom. “Is this okay?”

“Yeah,” she replied softly, sneaking her hand down to slip into his own, squeezing reassuringly. 

Slowly, he inched closer until his face was up close and personal with the shimmering folds. After another squeeze of his hand, he continued forward, not quite sure what he was doing but drawn by the scent of pure sex that his heightened senses were picking up on. With his free hand, he spread the folds to reveal the slightly swollen nub he had been so attentive to earlier. He traced it again with his index finger, eliciting a soft moan from Lydia above him. 

Derek finally leaned forward taking the nub into his mouth and sucking gently, savoring the slightly salty but not unpleasant taste. Lydia’s moans increased in volume as he slowly started moving his tongue back and forth, stumbling onto a rhythm. Slowly, he gained confidence as his ministrations seemed work, licking and pressing inside more boldly. He got lost in the sensation of flesh rubbing against his mouth, his face, mesmerized by the sounds that tumbled out of Lydia’s mouth. After what felt like hours of hovering in the amazing bliss, Lydia’s hand, which had grown limp in his, squeezed sharply in tandem with the muscles of her vagina around his probing tongue. He continued to work his way in and out of the fluttering contractions, licking up her come eagerly. Her scent surrounded him and it was all he could do to keep from coming in his pants, particularly when Lydia wrapped her legs around his shoulders, pulling him closer. His body canted forward, his hips rubbing sharply against the mattress. Regrettably, he forced himself to pull back, taking a few deep breaths to keep himself under control. He didn’t want this to be over yet.

“Wow,” Lydia exclaimed above him, tugging on their still intertwined hands to gesture him up. Mindful of his swelling crotch, Derek complied, settling in next to her, their hands resting on her stomach. She turned her head to him, face blissed out and more sated than he had ever seen in his life. “You know, when I offered to do this, I didn’t mean for you to be doing all the work.”

Derek grinned, ducking his head. “Trust me, I don’t mind.”

Lydia brought their hands to the waistline of Derek’s pants. “How are you doing?”

Amazing. Horny. Possibly in love. Or lust. It didn’t really matter in this moment. “I’m good,” he replied simply. “But I think I might need a minute before we continue...I’m so wound up that I…”

“You don’t want to show up to the party early, I get it,” Lydia assured him. “I could use a little recovery time myself.” Derek’s mind momentarily short circuited. She had already come twice, and here she was talking of doing it _again_. Wow. Lydia snuggled into his chest and Derek adjusted his free arm to wrap around her neck. “You’re pretty good at this, you know,” Lydia informed him. “I wonder if some part of you has access to your memories, even if you aren’t conscious of them. Like muscle memory or something”

Derek shrugged, “Or I’m just a teenage boy in bed with the most beautiful woman on the planet and I’m just following instincts.” Shit. “I’m sor-”

“Don’t you dare apologize for giving me a compliment,” Lydia ordered, shaking her head determinedly before leaning forward and kissing him softly on the cheek. “I doubt it’s just that, though. Trust me, I’ve been with my fair share of teenage boys, and let me tell you, most of them are not nearly as good as they think they are. You’re something special.”

Derek felt a flare of his old self flash up, the person he was before Paige… He cocked his eyebrow, eyes glinting teasingly. “Oh really, something special.”

“Mmmhm,” Lydia hummed in reply, leaning forward to kiss him. Though the gesture started out with the same teasing lilt of their exchange, it soon grew more heated, causing Derek’s cock to twitch in his pants, slightly annoyed by the lack of attention paid to it, but Derek didn’t care. He didn’t even care if he didn’t come at all, this had been one of the most amazing experiences of his life. 

But what did that even mean? His life wasn’t even really his own anymore, taken over by a man named Derek that had suffered hardships he could barely comprehend by hearing them secondhand. After Lydia pulled back to get some air, Derek asked, “Are you sorry that you’re here with me and not him?”

Lydia frowned. “Him…?”

“Me. Your me.”

“No,” Lydia replied almost instantly. “I regret nothing. But no, it wasn’t like I’ve had some longstanding crush on you...him...that I only acted upon once you were more age appropriate. And yeah, you might not be as ripped,” Derek grimaced. “But it’s really amazing to see a different side of you. See what you were like before everything went to hell. I think sometimes you’ve forgotten who you were. Are. This is confusing.”

Derek chuckled. “Tell me about it.”

Lydia leaned forward and kissed him tenderly, causing his stomach to do flips. “How about we do something to distract you?”

“I think that can be arranged,” Derek replied, grinning once again against her lips. Lydia’s hands slowly traced down his body (he sucked in his gut just a little, it wasn’t like he was that out of shape but every little bit counted), resting on the waistband of his pants. Slowly, she moved them to the front, first starting for the button but pausing, taking a detour to gently stroke him through the thick denim first instead. Derek let out a groan that was almost a mewl, his body reacting strongly at the first deliberate contact. Smirking in satisfaction, Lydia proceeded to unbutton his jeans, easing them down his hips, careful not to brush against his now nearly exposed cock. It wasn’t until he had scrambled out of the long lengths of fabric and Lydia had her hands on his boxers that he started to panic, suddenly feeling so exposed. It was ridiculous, Lydia had given him so much already, let him see so much. He had to reciprocate.

Luckily, she seemed to sense his hesitation. “It’s okay if you don’t want to go through with this,” she told him softly, emerald eyes boring into his own. “This was all for your benefit anyways, makes no sense if you’re not into it.”

Derek shook his head stubbornly. He was not about to let fear steal this from him. “I am into it,” he assured her. “Just...nervous.”

A soft hand cupped his cheek as Lydia smiled at him. “That’s okay.”

Shrugging awkwardly, Derek looked down, away from Lydia’s face, but considering that meant looking down at his obvious arousal, it wasn’t the best distraction. “It’s just...you’ve been with guys before, what if I don’t measure up?”

Lydia frowned. “I thought I told you…oh my god, are you serious? You are such a _boy_.” she exclaimed, shoving his shoulder playfully. “Look, to be honest with you? Girls really care more about how you make them feel than the size of the feeler. But if it makes you feel better, I’m sure you are perfect, okay?”

Derek chuckled embarrassedly. “Sorry I’m being so stupid about all of this.”

“No you’re not,” Lydia corrected. “So what’s the verdict? Any more doubts?”

Shaking his head, Derek kissed her again. “If I did they just vanished,” he informed her, startled by the sincerity of his words. Lydia was being so supportive, so kind in all of this. She gave him every opportunity to stop if he felt he needed to and he honestly couldn’t remember ever feeling more cared for. He knew that this wasn’t entirely real, that it was in large part an illusion, but it was one he was willing to accept for the time being. 

They exchanged increasingly frantic kisses as Lydia worked his underwear off, eyes closed to preserve a last minute of modesty. But finally, the moment of truth arrived as she pulled back, looking him up and down appraisingly. “Like what you see?” Derek half joked, half seriously wondering. 

Lydia’s eyes darkened, her face becoming strangely focused. “Definitely,” she breathed before lunging towards him, tackling him so hard that they both fell over onto the bed. She kissed him deeply as she pinned him down to the mattress and any last vestiges of worry disappeared. “Wait,” she whispered, pulling back and making Derek’s heart stutter nervously. “Condom.”

“Right,” he replied, kicking himself mentally for over reacting, reaching over as far as he could to retrieve the metallic packet. However, before he could tear it open, Lydia nicked it out of his hands.

“Not yet.” Derek raised his eyebrow questioningly, surprised at the sudden turn around. 

“Are you gonna blow me?” he asked, wincing as he heard himself speak. 

Lydia paused, considering his words. “Would you prefer that? I only have one condom, though, and while I’m sure you’re clean, I just usually use a condom for that…”

Derek shook his head. “As amazing as I am sure it would be,” he replied. “If we only have one shot I’d rather go in the other direction.” He was making the right decision, right?

“Okay,” she replied before reaching forward and taking Derek’s dick in her hand, pumping it gently into full hardness. He felt his eyes roll back in his head momentarily at the contact, amazing at how wonderful it felt and wondered if she had felt anything near this good when he had been the one touching her. He hoped so. Derek pulled Lydia back into a kiss, moaning into her mouth as her hand continued its slow and steady ministrations. It felt so different from his own; the angle, the size, even the lack of rough calluses. It wasn’t quite enough to send him over the edge...yet, but he was certainly getting close. Reluctantly, he pushed her away gently, gesturing to the condom again. Taking the hint, Lydia expertly ripped open the packet and slid the tight latex onto his length. He’d never worn a condom before; it felt odd but not unbearably so. Lydia distracted him from his thoughts with another kiss, this time straddling and grinding against him. “Ready?” she asked breathily. Derek nodded eagerly.

Lifting her ass, Lydia quickly grabbed his cock to guide it inside. She rubbed the tip teasingly across the entrance before starting to sink down. Derek hissed in pleasure as the warm heat slowly enveloped him, his senses on overload. Once he was in as far as he could go, she lifted her hips before slamming them forward again, guiding him by establishing a pace. Quickly, Derek started meeting her thrusts, feeling the heat coiling in his stomach. He ran his hands all over her body, trying to ground himself a little, but mainly to make her feel good. It was the most important part she had said. His hands finally rested on her bra strap. “Can I take this off?”

“Yes,” Lydia sighed distractedly, still mostly focused on where their bodies were fused. Derek reached behind her, fumbling with the buckle and feeling utterly useless for not being able to do something this simple. He finally got it, however, and the taut fabric suddenly went lax as her breasts were freed from their chambers. Lydia quickly worked her arms out of the straps before returning her hands to either side of his body. Slowly, Derek reached up, cupping one of her newly exposed breasts, studying it closely as he swirled his fingers deftly around her nipple. Lydia’s hips stuttered out of rhythm at the touch. Emboldened by her reaction, he grasped the other gently. They jiggled slightly from their mutual thrusts, but it somehow made the whole situation even hotter. Lydia threw her head back as she continued to work her hips down.

Abandoning the breasts for the time being, Derek grabbed her face for another kiss, distracting Lydia as he flipped them over so that he was on top. They exchanged furious kisses and time didn’t seem to matter. All that Derek could process was the foreign but strangely comforting sound of their flesh slapping together, Lydia’s moans that were growing higher and more breathy by the second, by the deep sounds he dimly realized came from his own mouth. Suddenly Lydia was squeezing around him again, her face scrunched up in pure pleasure as she shuddered underneath him. Derek thrusted a few more times but it didn’t take much after so much teasing for him to join Lydia in her bliss.

Once the last aftershocks fled his body, Derek slowly pulled out, rolling over onto his back. Barely able to keep his eyes open, he felt Lydia’s hands remove the soiled condom and heard a soft thunk as it landed in the trash can. The bed shifted and as he forced his eyes open he saw her standing there next to the bed in all her naked glory. “Don’t leave,” he mumbled, hand outstretched towards her. 

“I’m just getting something to wash us up, don’t worry,” she replied, leaning down to kiss him on the forehead. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

Derek must have nodded off again because the next thing he noticed was a warm wetness on his soft cock, barely registering the rough tug of a washcloth. It was such a thoughtful gesture and Derek just felt so taken care of and so damn sleepy. “Cuddle?” he mumbled as she set the cloth down on the floor and settled down next to him in the bed.

“Of course,” Lydia replied, pulling him onto her chest and stroking her fingers gently through his hair. Derek inhaled deeply, trying to imprint her scent to his memory, trying to hold onto this moment. 

“Was I okay?” he asked, already feeling sleep take over again. 

“You were perfect,” he heard her whisper before falling into unconsciousness.

*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*

Derek awoke, feeling slightly confused. He wasn’t used to waking up next to a woman. He assumed that was what the large warm lump he was curled into was. He hoped so at any rate. But something felt different. he blinked his eyes open, his gaze resting on his arm. His hairy and very muscular arm. Suddenly, as wakefulness came to him, it all came back, his artificial teenage memories melding with his real ones. He looked around at the woman he was snuggled against, starting when he simultaneously saw and remembered who it was. “Oh my god,” he muttered, sitting bolt upright and trying to put a little space between the two of them.

“Derek?” she mumbled softly as she awoke. Her eyes opened sleepily, though they widened and became more alert once she got a good look at him. “You’re back,” she stated simply.

“I guess so,” Derek replied. A thought suddenly hit him. “Oh god, please tell me you are eighteen.”

Lydia nodded, an odd expression on her face. “I am, though technically when I slept with you, you were the one underage.” She sat up, pulling the sheet with her to cover her chest, even though he had seen everything already. But somehow, that was different, something had shifted. It stirred something inside him, a kind of sadness he wasn’t entirely sure how to articulate. “I really should get going.”

“Right,” Derek replied, turning away to give her to opportunity to find her clothes and scramble into them.

“I’ll let Scott know you’re back. I’m decent by the way,” she informed him. 

Derek nodded. “Are you going to tell him…?”

“I stopped by to check in on you and you woke up from a nap all back to normal. Don’t worry about it.”

“Thanks.”

She smiled, though it seemed kind of forced, like she was almost disappointed to be leaving (or disappointed that he hadn’t remained in his youthful form for longer. “Well, I guess I’ll just…” she muttered, gesturing to the door.

“Wait,” Derek called out, stopping Lydia in her tracks.

“Yes?” she asked.

“Just...thank you. For everything. Now that I remember my past…that was so much better than my real first time. So thanks.”

Lydia grinned, seeming to relax somewhat. “Anytime,” she replied, winking before turning around and walking out the door. 

Derek fell backwards onto the bed, a strange tingly feeling in his chest. Maybe, just maybe, this whole ordeal had been a sign that he needed a fresh start. He remembered how his memory deprived self had such a hard time understanding his wallowing and wondered if he had a point. Because if embracing life meant spending more time with Lydia Martin…he could manage that.


End file.
